The most common retorts I get from others is that I am conservative and anti-feminist, a Natalist, and so many more which are aimed solely at incorrectly categorizing, stereotyping, and degrading me based on the surface appearance of my ideology. These are not true, however… Though at times I can certainly understand why people would think so when taking my blog and words at their surface appearance.
Indeed, it is easy to read my words as the ramblings of a woman who romanticizes Southern Culture and the 1950’s, is convinced Oklahoma is a Southern state (it is, and I refuse to argue about it), and who is conservative, traditional, and anti-feminist in viewpoint. It is also easy to make the assumption that I am also all of the negative, ignorant things that often come with such viewpoints.
Politically and ideologically, however, this is far from the case. In reality, whether others wish to acknowledge or accept it or not, there are a lot of things about me which conflict with and directly negate these opinions… I just happen to be all these things and a hyperfeminine woman as well… And that’s the truth of it: I am a lot of things. Retro Enthusiast and 1950’s Housewife Wannabe are just small facets of the whole of my identity.
These minor facets of my identity, though, do not negate the rest of my identity. For instance, I am married to a man, but this does not negate the fact that I am still Pansexual and Polyamorous. I am more conservative and traditional in many areas of my personal life and practice, but this does not negate the fact that at large I am a Liberal Leaning Centrist who abhors militant and extremist ideology from all sides; and I may certainly be against Radical Feminism, but that does not negate the fact that I am still a Feminist- and I most certainly am a Feminist despite what people deign to believe.
Before my personal ideology and the facets of my or personal identity, I am- first and foremost– a Woman who believes wholeheartedly in the right of people to do as they please with their lives and bodies within reason– even if I do not agree with those decisions myself, or would not personally participate in such actions and behaviors.
This includes my own choice to be a Housewife, attempt to emulate 50’s style Housewifery, and be a Hyperfeminine Woman in a world which is increasingly hostile on all sides to such Women… But it is far, far more broad than that; to me, the choice about what to do with your life, how, and when, is an inalienable Human Right. In other words, I believe that if you want to do drugs, drink alcohol, or get a tattoo, become a Housewife or an Astronaut, a Teacher or a Priest, have Children, an Abortion, or be Sterilized, and on and on and on…. That you should be legally and socially free to do that, within reason, and that no one should be able to tell you “no”- whether or not that “no” is social or legal.
By “within reason” I mean “up until you either begin putting the health and safety of someone else in danger (Drunk Driving or smoking around children, for instance) or your choices and actions begin to infringe on the rights of others (religious discrimination and so on)”.
The moment you cross those lines, I absolutely believe that you should be subject to legal and social consequences- and that there absolutely should be legal and social ramifications for doing so. And I believe that because after you cross that line? It’s no longer just about you and your life or your body… It’s about about the well being, safety, and general life (etc) of the others that you are impacting negatively with your actions.
I also believe that there should be some limitations in place. For instance, yes I believe that every person has the right to be able to get Body Modifications, smoke, drink, do drugs, and so on- and I believe that because it is ultimately their life and their bodies and it’s none of my concern… However, I do also still believe that you should at least be of the age of majority in your country to do so legally, due to their inherent nature of some of these things.
With this comes the belief that all people deserve to have their choices recognized and supported by others, regardless of whether or not we agree and understand them- and this is especially true when it comes to other Women; that we need to support people in those endeavors without judgement- and that such judgement free support is especially absolutely crucial to Women’s continued empowerment in a society that encourages a toxic hatred of and competition with each other for no reason.
In other words, I am not a Woman who believes that the lifestyle that I live is a lifestyle that all Women (or people in general) should live- nor that it is one they even can or want to participate in… And I am most certainly not a Woman who would ever dream of telling other people how to or not to live their lives, dress, act, and so on. I have my own personal opinions on these things, certainly- and I have made them known from time to time. But ultimately I know that my own decisions about my life are not and cannot be for everyone; for other people, I know that this will not (or maybe can never) be the thing that makes them happy, brings them genuine pleasure, or fulfills them– and I encourage all people to find and make effort to obtain that lifestyle which does.
Everything I say, do, and believe ultimately stems from this; it is the absolute center of my ideology and my world view, and I do not see that changing at any time in the future. So while it is easy to peg me as another “crazy conservative, anti-feminist” woman… First impressions and assumptions are not always correct; finding the plot requires more than just reading the leaflet and synopsis. It requires you immersing yourself in its pages, its characters, and its intricacies. After all, nothing is ever quite as simple as it seems at first glance.